The last couple of days have been very tumultuous. I may be moving away from the place where I've grown up and spent nearly my entire life. I have friends here I've known since I was 5 years old. Leaving behind all these memories would be incredibly hard for me.
But this situation has made me stop and think for a moment: yeah, my life's gonna suck here in a few months if I move. I'm gonna be the new kid in school, the new kid at church, the new kid on the block. And me having a mullet doesn't help things much. But the point I'm trying to make with this is pretty simple: I have every excuse in the world to be sad and miserable about life. But I'm not.
I don't say that to boast or to make myself look good, I'm far from looking good (again, the mullet doesn't help). But the whole point of me having this blog is so that I can share what I've learned throughout life in the hopes that others will somehow be helped by what I have to say.
Now, a story to help make my point: I had a very disruptive childhood. I have a dysfunctional family; not my immediate family. My grandparents, aunts, and uncles on both my mom's and dad's side have their issues; depression, drug and alcohol abuse, and a lot of other really unpleasant things. Through my life, I'm close to only one cousin out of the many I have, my cousin Ben.
Needless to say, having all these negative influences in your life, especially when you're young, doesn't help much in the way of having a happy attitude. I remember growing up and looking at my grandparents, my uncles, my aunts, and thinking why are they always fighting? Why are they always sad and upset? I remember how hard it was on my dad when his oldest niece, my oldest cousin, got pregnant, had her baby, then killed herself a few months later. Almost a year later, her mom, my dad's sister, died.
But the worst was when my great-grandfather died. Now, my great-grandma is the most amazing and wonderful woman to ever live on this planet. She is amazing. If I can even be half as compassionate and kind as she is, I will have achieved something great. When her husband died, it was something incredibly sad for all of us. The most perfect person I knew was now alone. Out of everyone in my family, I thought my great-grandma has the most reason to be sad after her husband's death.
Obviously, I went to the funeral. Afterwards, life got in the way and I wasn't able to go see my great-grandma for nearly 2 weeks after the funeral. When I got to her house, I was preparing myself to have her crying and sad, even though she hadn't cried much at the funeral.
When she opened the door, she gave me the biggest hug in the world and said I love you. I replied with the same hug and phrase, and then looked at her. She was smiling. She was happy. She wasn't tearing herself apart with grief, even though she had every right to do so.
This experience left me with the realization that no matter what happens to you in life, you can always be happy. Happiness truly is just an attitude. Happiness shouldn't be dependent on money, big houses, fancy cars, and luxurious vacations. If you let your happiness be dictated by the events of life you can't control, you'll be a very sad person. I know that firsthand: nearly every single one of my relatives is that way.
Back to the story: I asked my great-grandma why she wasn't sad. She simply said to me, "I know I'll see Harlan(my great-grandpa)in Heaven. He just beat me there is all."
Now, whether or not you believe in an afterlife or a God isn't any of my business. I do, and my belief in my faith gives me strength to go on through hard times. But the point of this story was simply to show that there is some good in EVERYTHING that happens. My great-grandma found the good in her situation in her belief in God and Heaven.
I've found the good in my situation, that I might be moving. I'll be able to move on to a different life, and meet new people and make new memories somewhere else. I'll miss all my old friends like crazy if I move, but I won't let not seeing them make me sad.
Happiness is an attitude. Remember that. You've got one shot at this life, don't spend it sad and upset. Spend it looking at the good in everything.
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